Andi’s exciting life.

I didn’t think it would take me over a week to get a chance to write my birth story, but Mr. Falco doesn’t allow for much blogging at this point. Let me warn my dear readers that this is the whole story with all the details, so be ready for a very long post with a lot of female information. To see the photos that go along with this story, check out Matt’s blog.

Here goes…

I woke up on Tuesday, 11/28, at about 4:00 a.m. with what felt like menstrual cramps that would come and go every few minutes. I went to the bathroom and had a good bit of spotting that I now know was bloody show. I got back to sleep from about 5 to 6. Then Matt and I woke up to get ready for the nonstress test we had at 8:30 to check on the baby since he was overdue. When Matt woke up I told him I thought I might be in early labor, and we figured we would find out for sure when we got on the monitors. When I got up from bed again, there was more spotting and the contractions were still going on, but I could easily talk through them.

We got to the testing center and first had an ultrasound to check the amniotic fluid level. Two different nurses measured the fluid level and determined that it was borderline low. (The level was 6.5 and anything below 5 is low.) We were then hooked up to two monitors, one to measure the baby’s heartrate and one to measure my contractions. The contractions were about five minutes apart and only very slightly painful. (The nurses said they could tell by how I was handling them that they weren’t real labor contractions, which I couldn’t understand until later in the day.) The baby’s heart rate was staying steady at 120 and he wasn’t active at all. During contractions, his heart rate would very slightly drop, which was worrisome because it should have increased instead. They used a vibrating buzzer to try to wake him up and get him moving, but he seemed to be sleeping and just wouldn’t get active.

So, based on my amniotic fluid index, his inactivity, and his heart rate dips during contractions, the doctor decided that I needed to go to labor and delivery for further monitoring to decide if I should be admitted. Before I left the testing center, the nurse checked my cervix and said that it was soft and I was one centimeter dilated, the same as I had been at my appointment two weeks earlier. During that exam, there was a good bit more bloody show and the nurse seemed surprised by it.

Matt and I had not brought our bags or even eaten breakfast because we felt sure that I was in such early labor that we would be sent home to labor for a while before needing to go the hospital. We were told to go straight to the birth center from the testing center and that we couldn’t go home first to get our things. We walked across the street and on the way grabbed gigantic pastries from the coffee cart and ate them as quickly as we could before getting to labor and delivery.

When we got to the birth center, they put us into a small triage room for more monitoring so that they could assess whether or not I should be admitted. This room had two small cots divided by a curtain, and there was another lady on the other side of the curtain. After being monitored for a while there and having the same results as in the testing center, a resident doctor came in to talk to us. She said that based on all the findings from the monitoring and the amniotic fluid index, the best course of action was to admit me. She said that early labor can go on for days sometimes so they would likely do some form of induction to augment my labor. She then did another cervical exam and said that I was more like 1-1/2 centimeters dilated.

Next, a nurse came in and moved us to a temporary room because all the labor and delivery suites were full. She said that it should just be a couple of hours before we would get our own suite, but we were placed in a postpartum room until then. At least this room was a little bigger and had a TV and was private. I was reconnected to the monitors and the nurse placed an IV catheter. She had to stick me twice, but it was no big deal. I have found that after all my blood tests after the miscarriage and then during this pregnancy, I’m not really squeamish about needles anymore.

By this point it was around 12 or 1:00. A new nurse came in and said that she was assigned to me. She said that the baby had become more active and now looked much better on the monitors. She said that my contractions were steady at 3 to 5 minutes apart and that they were discussing doing a Foley catheter bulb along with pitocin for my induction. I expressed my concern about pitocin because I didn’t want an epidural and worried that pitocin would make the contractions more painful. The nurse said that she would try to campaign for me to not have the pitocin because I was contracting well on my own but that it would be up to the doctor. She also said that pitocin has a bad rap for making contractions more painful but that actually it is the same hormone that my body is already producing. She said not to be afraid of it.

A little later, a doctor and a very sweet third year medical student, Jeanna, came in to talk to me about the induction. They explained what it would entail and said they would be back shortly to check my cervix and start the induction. We decided we had better eat lunch, so Matt went across the street and brought back burritos. My pain level wasn’t too bad at this point, but I didn’t have a very good appetite.

After waiting a while more for the doctor to come back, it was after 3:00 and we still hadn’t been moved to a suite and Matt hadn’t gone to get our bags. He decided to go ahead and go home because I really wanted my own nightgown instead of the hospital gown and all the other stuff we had packed for labor. It took him a while to get home and back because of traffic, and it was a little lonely and sad to be there by myself while he was gone. I kept waiting and waiting for the doctor to come back for the induction, and the nurse said they were so busy that it was taking a while for them to get to me. She said it was a good thing because it gave me more time to labor on my own and maybe not need the induction measures at all.

Around 4 or 4:30 they finally came back in to check me and see about inserting the Foley catheter. Matt still wasn’t back yet, but the procedure wasn’t painful or anything so it was OK to be by myself. The doctor checked my cervix and said I was still about one centimeter but that my cervix was very soft. Apparently my cervix was in a position that made it really easy to insert the catheter, so she asked the nurse to give it to her so she could place it. They said that when I got to be three centimeters dilated the catheter would fall out.

Just before Matt got back, I think around 5:00, the nurse came in to start the pitocin. She said she was starting it at a very low dose and that it would take an hour or so for me to feel it at all. Within just a few minutes, my contractions got way, way stronger and more painful and closer together. I was very frustrated because we still hadn’t been moved to a suite and I was stuck on constant monitors so couldn’t get up very easily. They had wireless monitors in the suites that would have allowed me to move around freely and even get into the tub while being monitored, but in the temporary room I couldn’t even get to the bathroom on my own and was stuck in the bed.

When Matt got back at around 5:00, we tried to start doing some of our planned tricks for easing labor pain. We tried playing cards as a distraction, but the contractions were too painful and close together at that point for me to concentrate. I did manage to get out of bed as long as I stayed close enough for the cables to reach the monitor. I tried a few different positions for the contractions like bending over the bed or table, but no position really seemed to help. I got back into bed and lied on my left side. Through each contraction I moaned through it and clenched the rail of the bed. I tried to relax my body but it was so hard because they were so painful.

By about 7:00, I had been having very hard labor for about two hours and the contractions were very intense and right on top of each other. I was very confused about how labor could be so intense if I wasn’t even three centimeters dilated yet, which I assumed to be the case because the catheter still hadn’t fallen out. I started talking about wanting an epidural because the pain was almost constant and I knew there was no way I could bear it for hours more if I wasn’t even really in active labor yet. I told Matt that when the contractions came I felt like I was going to die; that’s how intense the pain was.

The nurses’ shift changed at 7:00, and a new nurse, Sarah, came in. She said that we were going to be moved to a labor room soon, but they had been saying that for the past seven hours. Anyway, I told Sarah that I was pretty sure at this point that I wanted the epidural. She helped me to the bathroom and pulled on the catheter and it still didn’t come out. She also checked my bleeding and said that it looked like I had an amniotic fluid leak and that meconium might be present in the fluid. She helped me back to bed and talked about pain relief options. We decided that I would try a half dose of Fentanyl, an IV narcotic, to help ease the pain until we got into the labor suite. Just before she gave it to me, we found out our room was ready. She moved me in a wheelchair and Matt carried our stuff to our new room.

As soon as we got to the suite, she gave me the Fentanyl. It made me feel kind of like I had been drinking and more relaxed. I thought at first that it helped considerably with the pain, but that was because the pitocin had been turned off during the move. When she turned it back on, the contractions came back in full force. Over the next hour I got two more half doses of Fentanyl while we talked about whether or not I was sure I wanted the epidural. She was able to pull out the Foley catheter during that hour, so I knew I was at least three centimeters dilated. That wasn’t that comforting though because I thought I still had a long way to go. I finally said I was sure I wanted the epidural, and the anesthesiologist came in and was getting set up.

Before they could administer the epidural, a doctor needed to check my cervix to see how far along I was. A doctor finally came in, and I was in disbelief when I heard her say, “Well, there’s still a little anterior lip, so I would say she is nine, almost complete.” I was shocked and thrilled to hear that in the past four hours or so I had gone from one centimeter to almost ready to push! Of course I declined the epidural at that point and felt so proud that I had made it through labor. That doctor broke my bag of water (the leak earlier was very small the bag was still basically intact). It felt like a huge gush when she did that, and they said that there was meconium in the fluid. That meant that pediatricians would need to be there to examine the baby immediately after birth to make sure he was OK.

I think another hour or so passed before it was time to push. During that time, I barely had a break at all between contractions and felt a lot of pressure like I needed to push and was all around miserable. They were telling me to wait to start pushing, but eventually my body was starting to push on its own. Through all this, Sarah was really awesome and supportive. She could see that I couldn’t wait any longer and said we had to get me started pushing.

I lied on my back and Sarah held up one of my legs and Matt held the other. When a contraction came, I curled my body around my belly and pushed with all of my might for about ten seconds three times in a row. As soon as the pushing started, the pain was really gone. I just felt an incredibly overwhelming urge to push, but the pushing didn’t hurt. Unbelievably, the pushing lasted for at least two hours. I have never been so exhausted in all my life, and it took all my strength and then some to keep it up. Matt said that in between contractions I would kind of pass out and he could see my eyes moving back and forth like I was in REM sleep. I just remember closing my eyes and panting between contractions and Matt keeping an ice cold washcloth on my face that felt so good.

Eventually, after all that hard work, I finally pushed baby Falco out. My first words were, “He’s so tiny!” They took him immediately to the pediatricians to have all the fluid sucked out of his mouth and nose and for his exam. Matt went over to him and I could hear Falco crying. The doctors said he looked great and said his weight was 7 pounds, 4 ounces.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t really focus on my joy because I could hear the doctors still working on me talking about bleeding. I guess I was having more bleeding than expected after delivery, and they were trying to get my uterus to contract down and make sure there wasn’t a tear in my cervix. One doctor in particular was being really rough about rubbing my belly to get my uterus to contract, and that was very painful. I was lying there moaning through this part because it was really uncomfortable. The bleeding stopped fairly quickly though, and I heard them say that my cervix was intact. I had a second degree tear that had to be repaired, and that was quite uncomfortable as well. They used lidocaine, but again that doctor seemed to be very rough about everything she did and there was a lot of pressure and pulling and more rough massaging of my belly. All that lasted about thirty minutes, and Matt held Falco during that time. It made me so happy to see him in Matt’s arms.

After my suturing was done, I finally got to hold my son and nurse him for the first time. It took us a few minutes to get the hang of it, but with Sarah’s help he latched on and nursed like a champ. It was so surreal to finally hold my baby boy, and he was unbelievably beautiful. His birth was the happiest and proudest moment of my life, and I am moved to tears every time I remember the experience. There was a lot of pain involved, but I would go through it a thousand more times because he is so worth it.

Today’s appointment went well. The baby measured right on target, with my fundal height being 39 centimeters, and his heart rate sounded good without any weird rate decreases or anything like last time. The midwife said he is a moderately-sized baby, and she estimated that he is about 7-1/2 pounds. My body appears to be getting ready for labor, so that was good to hear. I have one more appointment scheduled for November 28, almost a week after my due date, but the midwife says she really doubts that I will make it to that appointment. I hope she is right!

I got a flu shot today, but I don’t really see the point because I am now sick with my second cold in about three weeks! As mentioned in an earlier post, we went to babysit our friend’s toddler on Sunday, and he seemed to be sick. He sneezed right in my face at one point, and I’m convinced that’s when I was contaminated with this virus. I woke up this morning with a scratchy throat, and I keep feeling worse as the day goes on. This especially sucks because I’m so close to having this baby, so it’s now very likely that I will be sick during labor and recovery. I asked if I would have to worry about the baby getting sick if I was sick, but the midwife said that wouldn’t be a problem.

I went to the grocery store today and got ingredients for a few meals to cook and freeze, so I’ll spend a lot of time tomorrow in the kitchen. I also got my wooden giraffe today for the clock, so I’ll paint that tomorrow too. The clock parts I got are too big for the giraffe, so I might actually just make a little giraffe sign for the baby’s door and scratch the clock idea. I’ll see how it goes.

Bring on the indignity of labor and delivery because my pregnancy embarrassment has already begun. Today over at our friends’ house, when I bent down to pick up their toddler, I ripped the ass out of my pants. Of course this happened before Robin and Sandy walked out the door to leave us for babysitting, so it was right in front of Sandy. I don’t think (I hope) that he actually saw my underwear at least. I heard the rip when I bent over and then stood and turned so that my rear was facing away from everyone. They went on their merry way while we stayed to babysit, and I raided Robin’s clothes to find some pants. I did find a pair that she wore when she was pregnant, but they were not very flattering on me and I felt highly unattractive for the rest of our stay there. I do have to admit that it could have been much worse and happened in the middle of the grocery store or something, but splitting your pants in front of your husband and male friend is pretty humiliating.

Our due date is now two weeks away. I hope it really will be two weeks or less until Baby G is in da house, but I guess I’m just as likely to be late as early. OK, I’m probably more likely to be late than early since this is our first, but let’s stay positive here. I’m penciling him in to arrive next week, and hopefully he will cooperate.

In the past few days I’m pretty sure he has dropped. My belly looks lower, and he feels heavier and lower. I’ve had a few contractions here and there, some a tad painful, but nothing to make me think it could be the real thing. I’m basically constantly on watch for any signs of labor at this point.

Friday is my last day of work, which I am happy about. I’ll probably spend a good bit of my time off hanging with my friend, Lynne, and also just trying to stay busy on my feet to try to get things moving along. I’m planning to make some meals to freeze for after the baby comes. I’m also going to work on a little craft project, which is making a clock for the nursery, so hopefully the parts I need for that will be here by early next week. I really don’t have any artistic abilities, so it’s likely that it won’t turn out well, but at least it will be a fun distraction to pass the time.

I’ll be honest with you, my friends. I’m not feeling quite as great as I have been up until now in this pregnancy. I’m generally aching somewhere most of the time, like my feet or hips or back. Baby Gleeson has gotten very big, and he likes to push himself under my right ribs, which isn’t very comfortable. I feel really tired like I can hardly keep my eyes open a lot of the time. I get heartburn pretty frequently, but that one is no big deal because it goes away with Tums at this point. Possibly my biggest complaint is that I feel very fat and have outgrown most of my maternity clothes. So, in addition to feeling physically uncomfortable, I also feel dumpy on top of it. Of course I would do it all again and know it is all worth it for this baby on the way, but I have to admit that I will be glad for pregnancy to be over at this point.

Enough whining. I have real information to share. We went to our second childbirth class last night, and it was enjoyable. I feel like I am getting so much out of every class. Last night we started out talking about the pain of labor like what makes it painful, what to expect, how to deal, etc. For me, my biggest fear is not of the actual labor but of the delivery. All that pushing and stretching and tearing scares the hell out of me. I fessed up about this in class, and our teacher really helped to alleviate my fears, which I am grateful for. She said that women generally tolerate pushing much, much better than contractions and that it is not really painful. She mentioned the dreaded “ring of fire,” which is the burning sensation that a woman feels when the widest part of the baby’s head is being delivered. This was a biggie fear for me. She said that, yes, it burns, but it lasts about 30 or 45 seconds and then it’s over. I’m sure that will be an extremely uncomfortable 30 seconds, but knowing how short lived it is makes me feel like I can do it. I asked about tearing, and she said that there is so much stretching going on and such diminished blood flow that women don’t even feel it if tearing does happen. This seems impossible to me, but I’ve heard other people say the same thing and will just have to believe that it is true.

So, after she talked about all that, we then practiced different positions we can use during contractions to help with relaxation and to ease the discomfort. I didn’t really like any of the positions she showed us, but we have even more in our book, so I’m sure there’s something in there that I’ll like. I expect to spend a large amount of the time in the bathtub, but we’ll see how I feel when the time comes.

Then, the big moment came of watching a video of a woman’s labor and delivery. I was feeling worried that it would traumatize me forever, but it really wasn’t that scary and actually made me feel better about the whole process. Basically, the more classes we go to the more comfortable and prepared I feel, which is great.

As a side note, let me give props to the delicious Mediterranean restaurant, The King of Falafel, where we have been eating dinner before our classes. This place makes a mean shawarma or falafel sandwich. It’s on Divisadero at Bush, and I would highly recommend it if you’re in the neighborhood. I can’t wait to get another falafel sandwich before next Tuesday’s class!

I have noticed in the last month or so that I blush really easily really often, and I hate it. I have to assume it has something to do with my increased blood volume or something. I guess I’m hoping that it’s a pregnancy thing because that gives me hope that it will go away soon. I actually blushed a lot all through high school but thought I had pretty much outgrown it. Now, anytime I feel in the slightest bit embarrassed or self conscious, my face gets beet red. I can feel it happening and feel embarrassed that my face is red, and that only makes the situation worse. My fingers are crossed that this will soon pass!

Yesterday I had my 31-week appointment with the midwife, and I am happy to report that Baby G is head down! I knew I could feel some part of him up high at the top of my uterus, and I was hoping that was his rear and not his head end. Upon palpation, the midwife confirmed that it is indeed his butt that I’m feeling, and she said he is in a very good position. She also said that he is unlikely to turn at this point, so I should be out of the woods on having a breech baby. Also, my fundal height was right on schedule at 31 centimeters. At my 26-week visit, the doctor I saw measured me at 30 centimeters, but I didn’t trust his measurement at the time. The midwife seemed to be more careful to be accurate, so I feel confident that the baby’s size is just right.

This was actually a new midwife who I had not seen before, but I really liked her. She mentioned that if she does the 37-week appointment that she does a limited ultrasound to double check the baby’s position and size and amniotic fluid levels, etc. I would LOVE to get another ultrasound, so I changed that appointment to be with her. Matt will go with me to that one, so he’ll be able to see the baby too. I can’t wait!

After waiting for a few months for this newborn basics class, I was really looking forward to it and expecting great things. It really didn’t live up to our expectations. The teacher was a lady who was very California and had a masters in counseling, so she was kind of touchy feely and liked talking about feelings. She seemed disorganized and just sort of touched on random things here and there without going as in depth as she could have on lots of subjects. If people asked questions, she couldn’t really give clear or complete answers. We expected it to be a labor and delivery or pediatrics nurse teaching the course, which I think would have been more useful. Matt wanted to leave at the lunch break (which was only half an hour!), but we decided to stick it out.

The fun part of the class was that we had a doll, pictured above, that was “our baby” througout the class. We picked a monster huge one that was too big for any of his practice clothes or anything. Hopefully our baby will not be born anywhere near his size. At the beginning of the class, the teacher said she wanted us to hold and interact with “our babies” throughout the class, which was fairly silly. She was holding a doll of her own and would baby talk to it periodically.

Anyway, all in all we walked away with a few tidbits of information that we didn’t know going in, but overall it was a waste of time. We did get to watch a portion of The Happiest Baby on the Block DVD, which was very useful after I had just read the book, but I could have just bought that on my own and saved a lot of time and money. Matt says he feels slightly more prepared than he did before the class, so I guess it did some good.

Oh, and I once again feel inferior about my belly size after the class. There was one girl who was 33 weeks along with a huge round belly, and I still barely look pregnant at all if I’m sitting down. Matt says I should be happy if it means that we aren’t going to have a huge baby and that a 7-pounder wouldn’t be a bad thing. He makes a good point. Also, I guess everyone just carries differently, and I need to stop having belly envy. I do get lots of comments from people now, so at least I am noticeably pregnant to the outside world. I’m just not that big.

Last night we went to the Armenian Food Festival with our Armenian friend, Garen, and two other friends, Cory and Alex. It was a good time, and we had some delicious food. Cory showed up with not enough cash, and Matt and I didn’t bring that much but we covered him, so we had to be very careful with our spending. Like eight-year-olds trying to blow our allowances, we spent every dollar we had between the three of us. For dinner, we got kebab plates with a kebab, rice, salad, and bread. Matt and I also got dolmas. They had pastries for dessert, and we got two pastries each. We both got something called Armenian Apple Delight, which was delicious and like apple pie with phyllo dough. Matt also got a baklava-like roll and I got a cream puff (which was not Armenian as I was told by Garen after I already bought it). Everything was yummy, and we saw some pretty good dancing acts while we had dessert.

I am thrilled to be 30 weeks along today! I’m 75% of the way to my due date and only 7 weeks away from the baby being full term, which is considered to be any time after 37 weeks. I will admit that 10 weeks still seems like a long time to go because I am so eager to meet this baby, but I have a feeling the next couple of months will go by quickly. September is almost halfway over already!

Last night I finished reading The Happiest Baby on the Block and now feel more prepared on how to handle our little dude’s crying. Of course I hope that we will have an easy going baby who hardly ever cries and sleeps like a champ, but it’s nice to feel like I have a clue as to what to do to calm him down if he is fussy. The book really could have been about a third as long as it was because the author likes to expand unnecessarily on things, but it was definitely a very informative read. Next up is The No Cry Sleep Solution, which is supposed to teach us ways to get our baby to sleep well without constantly holding him or letting him cry it out.

To further prepare for our little one, we have our newborn class this Saturday. It’s through our hospital, UCSF, and it’s called something like “Surviving the First Two Weeks with a Newborn.” I’m really looking forward to it and think it will be good for building our confidence that we are ready for this baby.

Yesterday I watched an episode of “House of Babies” that showed a mom with a breech baby who had to have a C-section instead of the natural delivery at a birth center like she wanted. Now I am afraid that our baby will be breech, although I have no reason to think that would be the case. My next appointment with the midwife is next Tuesday, and she should be able to palpate my belly and tell me the baby’s position at that point. Hopefully he will be head down! The last time we saw him was at 19 weeks and he was head down then, but I don’t think that really means anything because it was so early on. I can feel where he is in my belly now, but I don’t know what I’m feeling for so I can’t tell a head end from a tail end.

Is indecisiveness a pregnancy symptom? I have been having the hardest time making decisions about pretty much everything. The choices of what to have for dinner or which color shirt I like better or which TV show to watch all seem incredibly daunting. I’ve heard of pregnancy brain, but I thought that just made you ditzy and forgetful. Maybe being incapable of making a choice is also part of this condition. If this keeps up, my poor child will by lying half naked on his changing pad for twenty minutes while I decide which outfit he should wear.