Andi’s exciting life.

I was so excited when I ordered this 101-piece play food set. “101
pieces! That’s going to be awesome!” When the box arrived, I had so
much fun looking at all the different foods. “Look! Shrimp
tempura! Cute — a little hot dog and bun!” I’m not sure what I
thought Falco would do with all this food. Make pretend sandwiches?
Play grocery store?

Let me tell you what he likes to do with it: Dump it out, spread it
around, and then move on to the next thing. Much like his other
buckets, bowls, baskets, and wagons full of a million pieces (blocks,
legos, puzzles, etc.), it’s all about the dumping. Now when he goes
for his giant bowl of play food, instead of saying, “Good idea!
Let’s play cooking!” I’m more like, “Please don’t dump that out and
push it all under your bed.”

By the way, the 101 pieces have dwindled. Rosco has chewed up at
least two shrimp tempura, a piece of lettuce, and a slice of tomato.
There’s probably more, but that’s all I can remember. We had to
remove the sushi rolls, onion rings, and cherry tomatoes because they
were too chokable. At least that only leaves me with more like 92
pieces of plastic food to pick up.

I have mentioned my fashion challenges and efforts to look less like a schlub. I think I’ve had some recent successes and now wear casual skirts with my joke T-shirts if it’s warm. Who says I can’t dress it up? However, that’s when it’s warm, which it isn’t anymore. Let me give you a pro tip: You do not want to find yourself without a single decent-looking outer layer in San Francisco in the summer. I seriously have nothing in the way of a jacket, and it’s freezing here. Stores have summer clothes now, as if I really need a tube top for July in SF. Even on hot days, I still need a jacket at night (on the rare occasions I leave the house after Falco’s 7:00 bedtime).

How did I even get myself into this situation? I have lived here for going on nine years. I’m not clear on what I have been wearing until now or why I haven’t learned that I need to have a jacket by the end of winter or I’m going to be out of luck when stores switch to Spring garb. What is a girl to do when she needs a summer jacket and there are none to be found. No, seriously, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?

I just told Falco that we were going to go for a walk soon and that he would ride on my back. He started saying some unintelligible word that I figured out was stroller when he ran to his Zippy and started grabbing it and jumping up and down. He gave an emphatic “Yeah!” when I asked if he wanted to go in his stroller instead. He’s a pretty agreeable child, so I doubt he would put up much of a fuss if I loaded him on my back, but he certainly seems to have a preference now. Will he refuse to be carried soon? I guess now that he is nearly 3 feet tall and 25 pounds, I should realize that it can’t last forever!

Falco seemed like a sociopath this morning when he was hitting me and the pets with no sign of remorse, so much so that I actually looked up antisocial personality disorder. Here is a list of diagnostic criteria:

1. Failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest;
2. Deceitfulness, as indicated by repeatedly lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure;
3. Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead;
4. Irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults;
5. Reckless disregard for safety of self or others;
6. Consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations;
7. Lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another.

Wikipedia says that a person must display at least three of these to be diagnosed with this condition, and Falco is #1, 3, 4, 5, and 7 all the way. Doesn’t this list describe most toddlers though? Hopefully all kids are antisocial at this age to some extent and he will outgrow it. He did kiss his friend, Julia, several times when she was over today, so hopefully that is a sign that his heart is not made of coal.

Falco loves nearly deflated balloons as much as new ones.

Falco is way into the “no” phase of toddlerhood, and while I’m sure Matt would disagree, I think it is pretty hilarious. He doesn’t say “No!” in the rude, sassy tone that I have heard other kids use (I’m sure that’s still to come). Instead, he yells a long, desperate NOOOOOOOO that is funny because it seems like way too strong of a reaction to whatever he is yelling about. Like when I moved his bubble mower a few inches or when the dog took a piece of ice that he dropped on the floor, he started yelling “no” almost in a panic. He also does it when he starts doing something he isn’t supposed to like unrolling toilet paper or shaking the floor lamp. That is handy because it gives me a heads up that he is getting into trouble, unlike when he comes to me and says, “Uh oh” after the damage is already done.

We had a pretty good Father’s Day, although Falco seems to be back on
the teething train and was a little difficult all weekend. Matt has
started biking lately, and Falco is obsessed with his helmet
(”hat”). This photo was just after Matt got back from riding his new
bike home from the bike shop. It’s unclear if Falco’s excitement is
for seeing his daddy or daddy’s hat.

Yesterday evening, I walked to the grocery store and encountered multiple elderly, Asian folks carrying humongous bags over their shoulders and checking curbside recycling bins. This is a normal occurrence in our neighborhood Sunday evening, the day before trash day. I thought to myself how resourceful it is that they are picking up what other people throw away and turning it in for money. They are working very hard for surely very little, but it must be enough money to help them make ends meet. I always greet these clever hard workers with a smile and wonder if there is some way I could help them by leaving what they need in plain sight so they don’t have to search for it.

Tonight, I happened to find out that Sunset Scavenger, our local waste service, encourages you to report recycling theft. Now I’m supposed to believe that they should be reported as thieves? The city says that it’s OK for me to turn in my recycling for cash, but once I put it in the bin it’s their property and revenue. When I throw something in a trash can, I consider it public property. If someone in need can benefit from my garbage, fantastic!