OK, so as I have mentioned, my pants are too tight. I can still kind of wear my size 10s, but my size 8s are a joke. The Target jeans I bought literally fall off of me, so I don’t feel like they are appropriate to wear in public. There is a device called a Belly Belt that tricks out your too-small pants so that you can keep wearing them. I went to Motherhood Maternity today to get me one of those.

I was eagerly greeted by the sales lady, who eyed me suspiciously to see how pregnant I was. She asked right away if I was pregnant, and I said that I was barely pregnant but wanted to buy a Belly Belt. She got one for me and took it out to demo it. She asked me all kinds of questions about how many months I was along and said that it didn’t look like I was showing yet, etc., etc. I wanted to say, “I’m too fat for my pants, now just sell me the damn thing!” I somehow made it out of there with the goods.

Now I have this contraption, and it does work to make my pants fit, but it sticks out so much that I need special shirts to cover it up. Maybe walking around with my pants unbuttoned all the time isn’t so bad after all.

Well, my pants are too tight, and they have been since last week. I have been leaving them unbuttoned when I’m not out in public, but they are still uncomfortable. I am worried about gaining too much weight early on, but I have actually lost weight.

So, yesterday I went to buy some cheap jeans in a bigger size at Target. I bought a pair of size 12’s. They are more comfortable on my belly, but they look awful because they are way too big everywhere else. I expect to be in this transition stage for another month or two until I am actually showing and not just bloated. At least I work from home, so I can just wear PJ pants during the day for comfort.

I read last night that morning sickness often starts at 6 weeks, the same week that the baby’s heart starts beating. I’ll be in my sixth week starting Sunday, so I’m interested to see how I feel next week.

Well, I feel great, and I’m wondering how long it can last. I am entering my fifth week of pregnancy, and I have read that morning sickness usually starts between 5 and 8 weeks. Some people don’t get it at all, and I guess I hope to fall in that category. At the same time, they say that morning sickness is a great sign that you have a healthy pregnancy, so that’s what I’ll tell myself if I start feeling bad. I read in one place that when you get morning sickness, your chance of miscarriage is cut in half.

I signed up for a Healthy Pregnancy class for September 14th. I’m going it alone because I don’t think Matt can stand a 2-1/2 hour class about pregnancy.

Today is an exciting day for me because I am now officially “late.” I tested today, and it was still positive. I think that will be the last time I will test to confirm that I really am pregnant. I have accepted that it’s really true!

We went to a baby shower today, and the girl who was hosting the shower is due just two weeks after the girl whom the shower was for. I’m friends with both of them, and it was so hard for me to not tell them my news! They know that we have been trying, and one of them asked how it was going. I just said “we’re working on it.” I think she might have guessed that I am already pregnant — especially when I didn’t want wine and wouldn’t share any details about the trying process.

I almost cried during the present opening because I am just so happy that our baby is on the way. I am looking forward to starting to show and to be able to tell everyone that we are expecting.

Matt is going with me to the first doctor’s appointment on 9/16. It’s in the morning, and he will tell his friends at work after the appointment. I will be 8 weeks at that time, and hopefully the midwife will reassure us at the visit. The person who scheduled the appointment said that we wouldn’t have an ultrasound until 18 weeks, but I’m hoping that maybe we could hear the heartbeat or something.

I, of course, started my day with a pregnancy test to make sure that I am still pregnant today. There are definitely 2 lines, and the “yes” line is getting darker every day.

Working has been hard this week because I am very excited and preoccupied. I think that I will calm down with time as it all sinks in.

Today I went to Target to buy a baby shower gift, and I couldn’t believe that I could actually “legally” browse through the baby section. No more wandering through looking longingly at the strollers, tiny socks, and hooded towels for me. I belong in the baby section now!

We went over to our neighbors’ house for dinner tonight. I ate a turkey burger for lunch at around 12:00. By late afternoon, I was STARVING! I don’t know if I was hungry because I’m pregnant or if my lunch just didn’t fill me up. I’m very afraid of gaining too much weight in the first trimester, so I am afraid to start eating whenever I’m hungry. I decided to hold out for dinner, but that was a very hungry few hours.

After dinner I read in a pregnancy book that your calorie intake should increase by 100 calories per day in the first trimester. So, maybe I will add a yogurt in the afternoon or something.

Today I tested a few more times just to make sure. It seems to be that I really am pregnant!

Today I got to share the news with the people closest to me. I told my mom first thing in the morning. I told her by saying, “I’m having a sausage biscuit, a banana, and a glass of milk for breakfast. I need to start drinking more milk now that I’m pregnant.” There was dead silence for probably 5 seconds until I finally started laughing. My mom just kept asking me if I was serious. She was so happy and said that she was crying.

This afternoon, I went next door to tell my best friend. I just basically said, “Hi. I’m pregnant.” She squealed and hugged me several times. It was nice to have someone as excited as I am to tell in person! We talked about it for a while, and she hugged me a few more times. I’m glad I told her right away.

Then, I called my sister. She talked for a while about other stuff, then she said jokingly, “Are you pregnant?” I just said, “Well, yes.” She was very shocked and excited. She’s pregnant right now too, due in November, so it’s nice to be able to have our pregnancies overlap. This is her fourth baby, so she can give me a lot of advice.

This afternoon I had a very brief feeling of dizziness. Then I got really hot and sleepy. For the past few days I have felt periodic burning or tightening or pinching sensations in my lower abdomen. That’s about it for symptoms so far.

Today, with comparison and confirmation with a variety of tests, I found out that we are expecting our first child! I was really sure at around 3:00 when I took a digital test that said “Pregnant.” I tested very early, at only 9 days after ovulation, so I feel lucky to know so soon.

Matt didn’t get home from work until around 7:00, and I wanted to tell him in a special way. I played it cool when I greeted him. I bought him 2 books, 1 unrelated book that he wanted and 1 baby name book. He was home for almost an hour before he opened this gift! I wrapped the 2 together so that he would see the fiction book first. Then he saw the baby name book and kind of rolled his eyes like “why did you get this.” But I wrote a note on a post-it and stuck it to the front cover that said “We’d better get busy on choosing a name so that we’ll have one picked out by April 30, 2006.” He read that note and then he looked really surprised and happy. He just looked at me and said, “Really?” I said yes, and we both were happy and still a little shocked. Then we ate dinner (the food was already on the table). I was happy that he was happy, and I was glad that I really surprised him with the way I told him.

I am ecstatic, but I’m also still a little worried because I tested so early. I will feel better when I am actually late.

I should record for future reference what I felt before I actually got my positive test. Two nights before, I kept waking up during the night very hot. I am usually cold at night, so that was weird for me. The night after that, I woke up to cover up the puppy (at her not-so-subtle request), and when I got back into bed, I felt a strong burning sensation in my lower abdomen. I also just had a good feeling about this month.